I went to the gym today and had a great workout. I did a 4 mile run, followed by leg weights (working to strengthen the muscles that support my knees), pushups, crunches, planks and then 10 high intensity intervals on the bike. I finished up my workout with lots of stretches.

Over the last few months I haven't been able to exercise as much as I would like. There have been a couple of reasons for this including the problem with my knee and a problem with time due to the longer commute I've had the last four months. Now that my knee is a lot better I want to kick up the exercise and hopefully be in better shape for the marathon this year.

A second goal that I've had for a while is to run a race in every state. Rodney and I have always wanted to visit every state and this is an additional incentive. I initially thought to run a marathon in every state, but realized that might be overly ambitious, so I am going to aim for a race of any distance as long as it fits into the travel plans. I'd better get busy on this goal soon because I'm not getting any younger and there are a lot of states!

"Remember, the feeling you get from a good run is far better than the feeling you get from sitting around wishing you were running."

SARAH CONDOR

What an amazing journey the last 4 years has been. My weight has been basically stable for over 2 years I never imagined I would be successful at losing weight, and however hard that was to conceive I never thought I would be able to keep the weight off. Now my struggle is with worrying about regaining weight. It is a constant battle.

I am still amazed by the difference in my life. Losing weight has given me back my health and made doing things so much easier. The journey of the last four years is not measured just in pounds. There are so many other measures such as:

• my diabetes being under control. This is the number one, most important result of my weight loss!
• I can move with ease
• I can run. One of my life-long dreams was to run in the NYC Marathon. I fulfilled this dream in 10/07. I have developed a love of running!
• Instead of making plans to meet friends for food, I make plans with them to workout together.
• I don't have to worry about fitting into plane seats. It still is striking to me how much easier traveling is now. It is great not to have to worry about sitting in the middle seat, or having the stamina to walk through the airport.
• I can have a jar of chocolates on my desk for people who come to my office and not be tempted to have any. In fact I don't even notice they are there most of the time. In the past I would have eaten them all myself.
• I don't worry about presenting in front of a group of people because I'm concerned they will be focused on my weight instead of what I am saying.

As important as all my successes and WOW moments are, it is also important to me that I remember the pain. I don't want to forget how miserable I was, as I believe it helps me not to allow myself to go back there. I know it could be all too easy to slip back into old habits. It is easier to eat now, and I can eat more than I've been able to. I have to watch that I don't allow myself to start picking up bad habits along the way.

I am so grateful for my surgery and the tool it gave me to fight the battle with obesity. This past year has been difficult and I know if I didn't have the surgery I would have gained 50 pounds over the last few months! The surgery and years of new habits have given me the ability to get through this without gaining weight. It is still difficult not to have food to turn to sometimes, but the benefits out weigh the struggle by far.

There are so many people to thank for their support thoughout this journey, but I have to give special mention my amazingly supportive husband, Rodney.

Here are a couple of recent pictures:

With the Alabama mascot, Big Al:

With Sam:

Right now I am having probably the toughest time I've had since my surgery. The urge to eat and not exercise is ALMOST overwhelming. We are going through some very difficult situations right now and they are are several different fronts. It is very scary not to be in a regular routine with my life and my food. It totally freaks me out! I am also scared by the fact that I really haven't felt like running. I did run tonight and it was a fantastic run! I am so happy to have had a good run. So, I am trying to take it one day at a time and to keep focused on doing what I have been doing so far. Does the food demon ever completely go away? I'm thinking it is always waiting for the opportunity to rear it's ugly head.

Since I've been working out regulary with my trainer I've been doing modified push-ups (on my knees). Last night I did 5 full push-ups! I was so excited, I've never done a full push-up in my life. My form wasn't fanstastic, but I did them and I will continue to get stronger and be able to do more and do them better! One of my goals has been to do full push-ups!! It is so exciting to see the improvements in my strength.

I have a problem with all or nothing thinking - it is probably one of the big reasons I gained as much weight as I did - I was either on a diet or eating all out! Recently somebody posted on the ObesityHelp exercise board that she finished her Saturday long run on Sunday. The goal was to get all the miles in. I've read about splitting up runs between the morning and evening as a strategy also. Of course, I've never applied that concept to myself, either I got my run in or I didn't. After reading this post, something clicked for me and I've applied it the last couple of times I've been to the gym. I wanted to run 4 miles, but can't get to the gym earlier enough to get all 4 in before my training session. So, the lightbulb went off and I realized I could go back after the session and finish my run!